New voting system in Scotland

The political establishment has responded to criticisms that the different voting systems used in European, national and local elections were confusing the public. Concern had been expressed by senior politicians that the wrong numpties were being voted into highly paid public posts because voting wasn't easy to understand.

The Scottish Labour Party today announced that they would be proposing a new voting system which would be used universally for all elections in Scotland including Parliament, Europe and Local Government.

A spokesman for the party, Forsyth Twistleholme-Farquharson, said “It has been obvious for some time that the public has not been getting the representation that it wants. The increasing trend towards voting for obscure and unpopular parties like the Socialists and Greens is proof of this”.

“We are therefore delighted to announce our proposals for a new system of voting. We have called it the Scottish Harmonic Introduction to Elections (SHITE).

Using the SHITE voting system, we can be confident that the public will always get the elected politicians that we in the Labour Party would want them to get. The system is simple and goes like this. Each party candidate receives a number of points for every vote they get. The points are added up and the candidate with the most number of points wins.

Each party will get a different number of points according to whether they are the Labour Party or not. For instance, this is the system we propose for the next election to the Scottish Parliament:

“We are confident that the Scottish public will recognise that SHITE removes the confusion from the electoral system. They can go to the polls on election day secure in the knowledge that this new system will deliver a consistent and just outcome”.