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Cupar is a small
place, the County town of Fife. So the unfortunate farmer
who was recently found guilty of fornicating with his wife's
dog, won't be going down to his local boozer again for a couple
of decades. And a bit more probably.
Apparently, it was
a one-off moment of madness (lust?) caused by the state of
his marriage. It gives a whole new meaning to "giving
the dog a bone".
Rather than indulge
in highly enjoyable double entendres, we were wondering about
all-time lame excuses.
Here are some of
our suggestions. Some readers may have to ask their parents:
| I didn't
know I was going to be First Minister, did I? |
Shagger admits his
affair in public |
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| How
could I know the dog would get in the way? |
Norman
Scott's Great Dane gets shot by hit men allegedly employed
by the Liberal Party leader at the time, Jeremy Thorpe |
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| I must
have left my zipper down. |
Bill Clinton |
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| I've never
been much good at counting. |
Henry McLeish |
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| I didn't
know people lived in a city. |
G Bush |
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| I didn't
know people lived in a city |
T. Bliar |
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| How was
I to know that red, white and blue were the colours of
the British flag? |
Most US pilots in
Eyeraq |
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| I was
just making sure that your radar gun was working properly
officer. 126 MPH, you say? Yes, it's in perfect condition |
Princess Anne gets
stopped for speeding … again |
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| Please
excuse Wee Johnny from being absent yesterday. He had
diah, dirih, diahoah, dyah, the shits. |
Wee Johhny's mum |
If you've got better
ones, post them here:
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